As long as you live for you, you are all you have. No matter how much you like you, without Jesus you are a loser. It is when you dont like you so much and you dont want to be you anymore that you truly surrender yourself and lose you to Him, and find victory in Him. The first step in having a happy marriage and family is what? Someone has got to lose, and sometimes you have to lose a lot. My uncle Gary told me years ago, the secret to having a happy marriage is to end every conversation with, Yes, Dear. Sometimes it even seems like nobody is winning. That is when both of you start winning. As long as you got to be right, you got to have your way, you got to do what you want to do, as long as you keep count on everything she does and you do, as long as you are trying to win, you lose. It is when you stop keeping score and taste the agony of defeat that your family will get a glimpse of the victory found in Him. Once again, you have got to lose to you in order to win through Him. Ephesians 5:22 Wives submit to your husbands as to the lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.